13 on Thursday

May as well get into the blog tradition.  Blogs are only what?  a few years old and they have traditions?  or should they be patterns?

 

13 things for the weekend!

 

1. Need to get the financials written down for the expert to review.   

2. Have an appointment scheduled with the therapist.

3. Need to get the summer clothes dry cleaned and moved to the other closet.

4 Transfer the winter clothes to the bedroom closet.

5. Get the letter written to overthrow the parish priest.

6. Plan meals for next week.

7. Call Handyman Hotline to get those other 13+ things fixed.

8 Call the window guy to deal with the window.

9. Laundry

10 Ironing

11 Call the rebel teen ( another story)

12.Call friend about the  scrapbooking day mid October.

13 Relax, watch a movie or two, drink the Viennese wine in the elegant Viennese glass that cost half a paycheque!

 

Teeth & Marriage

I have two bad teeth.  One is soooo bad it's not there any more.  I am wearing a false tooth affectionately known by professional dentists everywhere  by its technical name  -  "flipper."  The other tooth, a middle molar is broken in half.  Everytime I get a temporary filling for it the thing breaks and I lose it.   I've stopped having the filling done as my dentist and I were having a better and more ongoing relationship than the spouse and I.

 

It comes down to the sympathy one receives when one has a pain in the tooth.  Until about four years ago, I was a  dental visit freak!  I was at the door of the dentist's office every six months like clock work!  NOTHING prevented me from going for those regular check ups and cleanings.  Then, with my life in a minor turmoil, mom dying of cancer, job at the time, up in the air, and Round 1 with the spouse it just all became too much.  It was at this time I had to start wearing a flipper because of tooth problems.  I had been spending a lot of time at the dentist's office which reminded me a lot of the hospital where my mom had been sick, which made me sick in turn.  That and a couple of misplaced needles in the mouth  by said dentist, who happens to be a friend, and I decided I had enough!   For awhile!

 

Now bear with me.  .  As often as I went to the dentist the spouse stayed away until he had serious pain requiring prescription pain killers and major work.   As a good spouse I tried being empathetic, offering sympathy, tea and whatever else a spouse might need from the wife to ensure caring in sickness clause.  This particular spouse was more like a lone wolf and preferred to hide in a corner and deal with his pain and suffering by himself.  I, on the other hand, appreciate all the TLC I can get. 

 

This was another one of those hints that things were not going well in the marriage department.  No sympathy or ANYTHING when I was sick or needing said TLC. 

 

 How, you are probably asking, do teeth have anything to do with the main topic of this blog, staying or going and the marriage? 

Well, it's quite simple really.

 

I came home early from work earlier this week with serious-really- bad-worse-than-natural-childbirth pain from this nasty broken molar.  I had been to the dentist before work, got the pain killers and anti-biotics.  By the time the spouse got home I was working on my fourth Tylenol3 which was completely ineffective.  He recommended whiskey.  sigh... yeah that should work well with the drugs.  Did I get sympathy?  Did I get help on how to deal with the pain aside from the alcoholic suggestion?  Did I get any TLC?  

 

Of course not... what I did get from the man who only graces the dental chair under severe pain - was a diatribe on why I should have dealt with this particular problem at the onset when it first started, how I needed to get back into the dentist's chair and what was my problem and blah blah blah...

 

It was about this time, I could feel the abscess starting to drain... a rather disgusting thing ... and it was all I could do to keep from spitting all that yuck and guk into his eye! 

 

Wife Warrior on the Road

I arrived home after a week away to "Oh! You're home already? I thought you weren't coming back until Sunday." This, I have learned from experience, is code for " You're not gonna be happy. The kitchen is a freakin' mess because rather than tidy up every day, I leave things as if I lived in a pig sty." Sure 'nuff.... dirty dishes, beer cans, glasses, newspapers piled up, and the mail not sorted... all over the kitchen. sigh.

This is how he chose to live with Tweeny this week. Why, why, why doesn't he get it?! I had loaded the dishwasher before I left, turned it on, looked them BOTH in the eye and said, make sure you empty this so that it can be loaded up again during the week. ......whatever!

Highlights from my trip? Austrian Air is efficient. 300 people getting meals and drink in ten minues and everyone pretty much getting their choice. In seat entertainment units. Three movies coming home.

The cockpit video cam meant we watched the plane land and take off with the pilot's view. OR we could see the geography below once the plane was low enough. Way cool!

Sleeping overnight on the way to Austria...Window seats work better than aisle seats! Not a lotta luck sleeping in an aisle seat!

My luggage was lost and I spent my first 24 hours in Vienna without clean clothes or liquids, powders or pastes - a tad annoying. But how long can you be annoyed when you're walking in a historic city, soaking up atmosphere, sight seeing, and drinking amazing BEvERages. Suitcase arrived half an hour before the start of meetings!

Sacher torte... the original. Died and gone to heaven. Even brought some home.

Work went well. Meetings productive.

Spouse and Tweeny survived without me. I used to travel a lot so this is not difficult for either of them. I wish though that spouse was more of a disciplinarian when I am gone. It is more than annoying that he lives like a slob when I am gone. It doesn't teach the children a thing. He took her for a hair cut. They made lunches together but THE MESS!

Oh and did he ask me how things went on the trip?

13 on Thursday

With apologies to the Shop Girl for stealing her Thursday list thing... but when a theme works it works. The date refers to when the project was started.

13 unfinished projects

1. Second floor bathroom hole in the wall is patched but not painted. summer 2002
2 Second floor bathroom painting touch ups on walls and ceiling. summer 2002
3. Second floor bathroom trim around the vanity needs to be attached. summer 2002
4 Second floor bathroom electric fixtures need the plates and proper plugs summer 2002
5 Main floor powder room trim around the vanity needs to be finished summer 2002
6 Main floor powder room - exhaust fan needs to be cleaned and re-attached summer 2002
7 Rebel teen room - curtain rods summer 2004
8 Rebel's rooom - doorknob on the door would be nice 2004
10 Tweeney's room trim/moldings at the bottom of the wall 2004
11 Electric fixtures and plates 2004
12 Spare room electric fixtures and switches need repair 2003
13 Second floor fan would be nice to have the fan working with the light rather than one or the other!! March 2006
14 Kitchen - broken window needs to be repaired before the snow starts to fly... March 2006
15. trim and frame around the front door was taken off and needs to be replaced. November 2005
16 The Royal Staircase... trim and paint repair work. summer 2005

Oh did I go OVER thirteen???? sigh.... and these are the ones that are obvious!
I will be out of the house for a week... far far away in another country on business. Blessedly so. Talk to you all upon my return after the 25th.

The Eldest on Adventures

Ah... a break from my ongoing and never challenges of bad marriage to talk more of *she who must run away* from home!

Ah yes... a few weeks of that angst on top of everything else was cause for alcohol... which I figured I needed to avoid because of weight loss and the general feeling of not feeling quite in control. A glass of wine maybe.... but not even full... sigh.

Trying to get information out of *she who had to run away* was painful. Shouting and screaming matches, name calling and more. Her to me. All the while her father, the spousal unit, would never come to my defense would not even once get himself in front of her and tell her to stop with the disrespect. I suspect the amount of alcohol he was drinking dulled his senses and didn't allow for any kind of clear headed thinking.

To that end - I got in his face one evening and told him that his lack of support for the office of motherhood was not impressive. That his tacit nod in allowing the eldest to be rude and disrespectful, was starting to rub off on Tweeny, her sister.

In the end, several of the men who are my friends and family managed to dissuade said Teen from going to work in the rough and tumble world of the meat packing plant. She used a credit card, given to her by the Royal Bank of Canada those carpeting bagging, money grubbing, typical greedy, profit motivated bankers, to buy herself a plane ticket west. Did I mention no job and about $250 in the bank, if that? By the time THAT debt is paid off guaranteed the $300 ticket will have cost double!

And she and her friend, the one who sleeps at home with the lights on when ever mom is out... which would be EVERY night of the week - fly out. Two days later I got a phone call at home. "Mom, I need $600.00!!! Once I am done spewing my wine, I ask why. Turns out the place they were supposed to stay was not interested in having her friend around. She truly has no social graces... no surprise. So I ask about a Plan B. Apparently there isn't one. I tell her I can't give her $600! That she needs to call relatives or friends and figure it out. She says she doesn't know how to ask for help to stay a few days. Well then says I, you're gonna learn aren't you because I can't give you that much money. Talk about the toughest thing I had ever had to do for my child.

But... I did make a few calls in case her pride held her back, and she ended up at my cousin's house. Cuz was heading out on a trip and needed babysitters. I am hoping my child acted responsibly... but who knows. Said Cuz has access to the blog and may fill me in down the road.. Please do.

Cuz in law bought the girls construction boots. I told the eldest... BEFORE she does ANYTHING with her cash... she and the friend MUST pay back the cousin. That was NOT part of the deal at all.

Interestingly, the eldest has been chatting politely to me via phone, email and text messages . Much nicer tone since she left. No kidding eh!

As she left, her father, didn't/couldn't even tell her he loved her. I shake my head.