Blue Slushie Reward!

Another positive. The speech pathologist came by today to see how Rebel was swallowing. She was pleased with what she saw and Rebel was rewarded with ice chips. The smile on her face was amazing. You'd have thought she had had tasted the finest wine, the best of chocolate or the ultimate in gourmet treats. But it was ice chips. And when Rebel asked if a slushie was in the same league as ice chips... the speech pathologist, after a couple more tests, including swallowing some icy cold water and a couple of teaspoons of apple sauce, said. "sure - why not!"

Rebel crowned her Best Friend Forever! And soon enough a blue slushie made its way to Rebel's bedside courtesy of buddy of the BFF! Rebel loves this guy too. And for a young one... he's got a killer smile... but ears stick out... so the Mrs Robinson thing isn't firing.... but... wait... it's not about me is it? And once again Rebel closed her eyes as she took a mouthful of icy cold blue slushie and she savoured the taste and the moment.


She said the slushie was better than her first *legal* drink in a bar! For the American friends.. legal drinking age where we are is 19... across the river next door in the next province it's 18!

Rebel also spent an hour on physiotherapy today - and managed to sit up in a cardiac chair for a short period. She is working hard and it is showing in the positive steps she is making. We are marveling at the miracles of modern medicine, traditional prayers, uses of energies of the body and mind, and even the woo-hoo factor.

Another small step.

The physiotherapist had Rebel stand up... twice today. She had jelly legs, but she did it. Her nurse, attacked her hair again, and got all the knots out. The nurses are all feeling better about her hair. She is off an oxygen mask and has those small nose tubes only. Even at that, she is only using a small amount of oxygen. I think she feeling a little anxiety about getting weaned off this.

Rebel had a tough time sleeping yesterday night A little bit of anxiety about breathing and sleeping at the same time. No surprise at all given everything else she has been through. I told her I couldn't sleep much either last night because I figured she'd be worried about sleeping.

her nurse gave Rebel some ativan this afternoon after her work outs so that she would nap. So I told her I would take my drugs tonight so I could sleep too.

My own doctor suggested I have some massage therapy which I did today. It was amazing how all the stress made it's way through my body and out. About half way through the massage I could *feel* things leaving my body and I started to cry. The massage therapist was good, and told me to keep crying until all the stress left my body. Man, I was exhausted by the time I left but I felt a whole lot better. She told me I was holding way too much inside and she had to really work to help me let it go. I was *ordered* to return next week. I have to say...I appreciate the health plan we have as government employees ( thank you union!) and that massage therapy is covered. And indeed I will return next week and enjoy I hope a little more the full treatment.

That plus one of the "church girls" (MY generation can NOT be "church ladies!") brought me lunch at the hospital and we had a good conversation. Also much appreciated.

Prayers are being heard.

Friends are being supportive.

What more could one ask for?

Deep Breaths.

The breathing tube came out this afternoon. This was huge. The respiratory therapist, the physiotherapist, a nurse, a doctor, the transplant coordinator were all in attendance. And Rebel did well.

They kicked the BF and me out of the room as the doctor told us that Rebel needed to focus on her breathing coaches to get her body to remember what to do.

When I came back an hour later, the physiotherapist had her sitting up with an orderly holding her up and her nurse brushing her hair to get the knots out. The physio had her coughing to get the phlegm out of her lungs, and trying to get her to keep her neck up. She has an oxygen mask on to help her. As I left they were very pleased with how she was coping.

Her nurse gave her a taste of icy cold orange juice on a sponge. No liquids yet until they are sure she can swallow and not choke or have anything end up in her lungs. That will be another day or so.

For the rest of the afternoon, the respiratory therapists would come by and smile, the nurses would all come around and give Rebel a big thumbs up, and even a couple of the doctors checked in. Rebel was happy to lie down again.

The swelling in her legs is improving. And she is moving her ankles and knees up the way the physio told her to do for exercise.

We are still waiting for her kidneys to kick in and for her blood to clot properly on its own. For now... little by little... small steps and milestones.

Prayers are miraculous and the Lord hears!

Thank you all!

Stable Today.

It was a quiet day today in the hospital. I spent the better part of the day there today. When they change dressings or need to clean her or change IVs I get kicked out for part of the day. The BF and I switched off and SU has gone to spend a little time this evening. He surprised me by buying the BF a parking pass for the month. The BF has managed to get a bundle of parking tickets at the hospital. They're ruthless those carpetbagging city meter people... It's just wrong. But... I digress...

According to our Rebel, I suck at sign language. Her very airy fairy hand signals don't get her messages to me. There was a lot of eye rolling on her part.

I brought in some photos for the room, - a few of her best friends and her sister as well as a page that she did in her scrapbook the last time she was in the hospital. That plus a couple of Tinkerbell pictures and I had the room covered. She was happy to have them there.

They have started some physio therapy - aka "training" for her legs, arms as well as her lungs and muscles that support the lungs. This is important to get off the breathing tube if the fluid is coming off her body. It will also start to help her gain back strength and get her prepared for heart transplant and recovery. The docs are still watching for "ooziness" and bleeding around her dressings. Today, they were satisfied. The weekend, we hope and pray will be a quiet and calm one for her.

And our friend Lily is running a half marathon in Phoenix on Sunday. She was told that when you focus on something during a long run it can help you get through when you don't think you can. So as she said earlier she is running for Rebel on Sunday. She will have a picture of Tinkerbell with her and has chosen a bible verse that inspires her.

Isaiah 40:31:
“But those who hope in the Lord
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary;
they will walk and not be faint.”

A good message on which to focus.

Clearly Making A Difference.

My goodness! I walked into Rebel's room today and she was *quite* alert. She was pretty emotional for a bit... The Heart Transplant Coordinator was there too. She visits Rebel every day.

Rebel's first comment to us both was mouthed through her breathing tube... BA-BEE? What? Baby? and she shook her head yes. The ticking of the LVAD was making her think she had a baby on her tummy. We laughed as did the nurse as no one had never heard that one before. So we told her what it was and that she was sort of bionic and we think she accepted that even if it seemed to be freaking her out.

She was far less agitated than yesterday. We told her what day it was... and I think that kind of threw her for a loop. I told her we would celebrate Christmas with her once she was strong enough to open her presents.

Things were more interesting.. as she motioned for paper and pen and wanted to write things down. The first few things didn't make any sense. I couldn't read what she was writing. The nurse lightened up her sedation, and finally I could read what she wrote.. *school* My Rebel was worried about school! I told her that her principal wanted to visit her and she kind of rolled her eyes and shook her head no. I asked her if she wanted to do home work - and she did give me a look at definitely said.. "are you effing kidding me?!"

She seemed to be worried about a few things and I reassured her that there was no need. I told her her dad and I had everything under control. All she had to do was continue to get stronger so the breathing tube could come out, and her body could continue to regain its strength.

SU said that she was writing a lot when he went to see her after work. And even in her writing there was some humour too. No doubt this will tire her out. But it appears that there is some improvement in her strength. Her heart still beats erratically I think... but the nurse told me that as long as the LVAD is there it is keeping time and beating properly for her. I have to trust them. Small steps.

Prayers and positive energy are clearly making a difference,as is time and the amazing work of the dedicated medical people at the Heart Institute.

Prayer and Mediums.

I had a phone call from my cousin in Alberta yesterday. We've come to know each other as adults, have shared our life experiences and she knows the Rebel quite well. Cuz told me some really freaky, and *out there* things last night while I was at the hospital visiting Rebel. The Spouse of course, scoffed it all off. He would. He must. he refuses to try and find a truth that doesn't reflect what he believes could be possible.

She has been studying spiritual awakening type stuff... clairvoyance type things- in a church - meditating, and learning how to cope and use this gift. From what she said it is something you have and the discernment of you handle this gift must be taught in the right surroundings, with the right people as the one with the gifts can be hurt or can administer hurt. She is training herself in the art of healing. Of course, upon learning about our Rebel she started putting training into practice. And this is where things make me get the shivers.

It would seem that the prayer circles I have invoked are very loudly and clearly being heard beyond our scope. They do make a difference. If one believes in these sorts of things or not, it would seem that creating a focused message and prayers and thoughts send an energy force.

Cuz is still in training so to speak, but she clearly felt and saw the presence of my grandparents and mother while she was focusing her meditations of healing on Rebel and learning how to practice her gift. My mother spoke to Anna very clearly - *in my face as only Auntie M can* Cuz described. I know exactly what she means. Mom told her to tell me that she and her parents were with me... watching and looking out for us. This unnerved me completely, yet... it was reassuring.

Prayers work.
In ways we can't fathom.
They work.

Prayer, spirituality, and the sound of people sending their thoughts in a specific direction makes a difference. I believe it. Whether one can truly communicate with those who've passed, well... many religions speak against it, including my own. However Cuz has some kind of gift, (or curse) and by sharing what she believes with me, is one more positive power that may make the difference in how I too need to keep my faith positive and my prayers powerful. This is not a gift that one takes lightly. If my mom and grandparents are watching over us and can help us help the Rebel, than thanks be to the Lord for this terrifying gift that Cuz has to share.