Breathe Deep.

A cold has kept me down the last few days. I stayed in bed most of Friday and Saturday. Sunday the weather was so stormy even if I wanted to move I didn't bother.

I have no idea what is going on with the SU either. He didn't get out of his lair til nearly 6 PM on Sunday. I decided I'd better go out and get all the show off my car on Sunday rather than waiting til I had to leave for work on Monday. That was at around 4 PM.

As I am sweeping the snow off the top of the car I started having evil horrible thoughts about whether or not I should find out if the SU was alive or not in his lair. How does someone stay in bed all day without at least coming to see what's going on around the house? I have to admit I started having fantasies/nightmares, of knocking on the door asking if he was alive only to open the door and see him dead - or worse - see a stroke victim. Yikes! If he has had a stroke, I'd have to get him to a hospital - then deal with the girls. Christmas would be miserable - again. After Christmas would be worse. I'd end up having to look after him because - we 're not divorced and I'd have to do the right thing.

By this time, I've finished sweeping the car of snow, and a plow has come by and blocked the end of the drive way so I am trying to shovel up a huge row of snow to ensure I don't get stuck getting out of the drive in the morning.

hmmm maybe I could just put him in some kind of care facility. I don't want to feed him and wipe drool from his face for the rest of my life. How unfair is that?! Can't sic him on his family either as they have enough to deal with with the old folks. It'd be just like him to fuck up his own divorce and end up having to have me look after him. I'd never have sex again because - how do you divorce someone who is now dependent on you? That would just be so unChristian never mind unCatholic!

By now, as I have heaved enough snow and worked myself up into a sweat both physically and mentally, I was psyched up enough to figure I'd better check on the SU when I went back into the house to make sure I got him into a hospital before he was permanently damaged for the rest of my life.

As I walk in the front door and start yanking my boots off I hear Rebel yell - "Dad! You sick or something? What's with the teen age sleep thing? Good morning! Oh wait... yeah... it's 5:30 at NIGHT not MORNING!"

sigh.... breathe deep Marie... breathe deep.