I see that XSU has started bringing home bins - but there is nothing in them yet. I've also seen that he's left his papers lying around the house - either in his room or down in the basement on his work bench. I don't think he realizes that our daughters snoop almost as much as I do. He has left the separation paperwork,the financial stuff, his house stuff out openly as if he wants it to be found.
I've told him I need an itemized list of everything he plans to take from the house. I told him I wanted it in writing sent to me by email. Once again he gave me his * I am offended* look. WhatEV!
The one decent thing he's decided is to buy Rebel a car. He is really freaked about germs and her immuno suppressed state and decided for her to be travelling on the bus during the winter to go to school wasn't a good idea. Also, her BF doesn't run a car - just his work truck - and we've already had a few incidents where he leaves her on Saturday to work extra shifts and she can't get out anywhere - the bus where they live has lousy service too.
In the XSU's eyes - her having a car will allow independence and she won't be stuck in the house like a prisoner. It will allow her to do what she wants when. Because he is so much older than her and totally insecure he does not like it when she goes of on her own. ( and isn't this a critical sign and she knows it) XSU has his eye on her and him on this one - so that is good.
Give these two arguments - I had to say I was in agreement. Buses are breeding grounds for horrible germs - and people are not always respectful about sneezing, coughing, and using their hands. Germs sit on these surfaces for ages, and I don't believe these buses are ever wiped down to any great degree. It's a good idea - but even better is a car for her - and apparently he can afford it. My contribution he said would be equal to half a month's bus pass - about $45 a month. I can live with this.
I am going to plan a champagne brunch I think after XSU is gone. He's planning on taking Rebel Junior with him to visit his parents in Nova Scotia so I will be able to shout and do what I need to do without offspring in the house. It would be a good time to celebrate new beginnings and perhaps shed a tear or two if need be.
Window order is in. Hottie the Handyman to start the estimate process for redone rec room on Tuesday. I will have to do before and after pics here and/or on Facebook.
Learning to Drive a Whole New Way
1 year ago
5 comments:
I guess he doesn't like the idea of having to tell the kids so he will let them "discover" it and then they will ask you, of course.
Nice that R will be getting a car. Once she is less dependent on BF maybe things will fall apart faster. Not that anyone wants broken hearts but sometimes it is better earlier than oh say 22+ years down the road (in my case).
Champagne brunch sounds like a wonderful plan for all the reasons you stated.
hang in there
{hugs}
~R
It will be nice to have space to do your celebrating and/or grieving once it is all said and done.
I think it is fabulous that he wants to get her a car but WTF is up with these guys making these decisions and then expecting us to ante up? That being said, at least it will allow her to come and go as she needs. That can't be a bad thing.
Itemized list. Excellent move. I recall when the X started whining about how I was getting all the contents of the house. He did this in front of the mediator. I looked at him and told him he was obviously entitled to half of what was there and he should come and take his half. He declined. I asked the mediator to make note of his decision so that we did not need to revisit it some day.
I packed the X's stuff on a couple of separate occasions. The first time I boxed it all up nicely and put it on the front porch. I then sent him an email telling him it was there and that he should come and get it. The second time was when we were trading cars. {Honda vs Truck} I filled that truck to the brim with his crap. He was SO not amused but hey, you move out you gotta take your crap. LOL!
Are you ticking down the days? Any word on his actual closing and getting keys?
*hugs*
~ b
close and keys... Blondie... Tuesday's post... I am SO rolling my eyes...
Well that does not sound promising at all. I am SO not surprised.
~ b
word ver: boxia - XSU needs to box-ia all his stuff up yesterday!
Yup I'm with Blondie, be pro-active, pack him up and put them out in the garage, so he never crosses the threshold again. Because it will no longer be his house to come and go in.
That's what I did too!
It is a sad time, but look at how bright your future will be, peace of mind means so very much.
xxoxoxoxo
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